quietly laughing uproariously

Date	Place	Duration	push-ups	Long sprint (uphill)	Pull-ups	Long sprint (downhill)	Time
27 Nov	RrugaKavaja	41 min	25,25	1:03.43	15	59.06	09:17

Date	Place	Duration	push-ups	Long sprint (uphill)	Bus stop 2	Pull-ups	Classic	Time
29 Nov	To Park	52 min	25,25	1:06.01	55.04	17,11,13,  09	51.80	07:20

     Saturday, I began the run thinking I would come home again before getting the bike and picking up the boys at their mother’s apartment.  During the run, I changed my mind and decided to run through the park to the apartment and pick up the boys right away.  One can see from the stats on the 29th that I finished the run with the classic sprint in the park.  This is the sprint up the hill.  

   
 Lately, I have been finishing the sprints in a state of utter exhaustion.  The main pain is in the chest, trying to fill myself with oxygen.  My chest feels constricted as I gasp for the sweet air to alleviate the pain.  The legs are sore, the arms are sore and sometimes even the neck.  As I’m running, I try to imagine what I must look like to the vehicles that are driving just to the side of the median, not 3 feet from me.  I imagine that my face must look crazed, fierce, or ridiculous.  As I’m running, I try to be sure that I am running on my toes, and I intentionally throw my arms forward and pull my legs upward.  I am quite happy when I finish because I am stressed out in every part of the body.  I feel like I have truly given myself a workout.  

    I’m not sure if the people are looking at me with humor, or admiration, or incredulity.  At some point, I may even garner the fortitude to look at them.  If a meet their eyes, will I smile?  …will I be able to keep a straight face? …will I laugh, or even become angry?  Maybe there is something in me that will be angry that they are looking at me.  Why would such an emotion come?  I guess because it seems that people in the world are so used to doing whatever they want, that when someone takes notice, people are upset.  But why would someone be angry?  If you think about it, why is someone making such a spectacle of themselves if not to attract attention?  I don’t really want to attract attention—at least I tell myself that I don’t.  This is the reason I am uncomfortable doing my push-ups in the middle of a busy sidewalk.  Of course, it is never in the middle—I go to the side so I am not blocking pedestrian traffic.  Actually, though, I look for an out of the way spot for the push-ups.  I walk back into one of the courtyards and try to find a small set of steps.  I try to find a step so that I can have my feet elevated to the small height.  This will make me work a bit harder.  

     A couple times, I found some steps way back in the bowels of a courtyard—I had to walk around through some narrow passages to find it.  However, some salesmen at some kiosks watched me go back there and were able to see what I am doing if they look over a couple cars.  The first time, they probably were totally confused at my behavior.  The second time, I caught glimpses of them quietly laughing uproariously.  How can they “quietly” laugh uproariously?  Well they were completely full of mirth, but they didn’t want to give the idea that they were laughing AT me.  So even thought they were, in fact, laughing AT me, they didn’t want to be rude.  How nice.